George Carlin died yesterday. Please see my previous Blog from May 26 to see how I feel about that. If you were never a Carlin fan please feel free to skip this. For those of you who did enjoy his comedy, I thought I’d share some of my favorite Carlinisms. They may not be word-for-word but you’ll understand
Who gave airline pilots the rank of Captain? The airline? The Captain requests that you put your seats in the upright position. Oh yeah, tell him Field Marshall Carlin says to go #!@$#@ himself.
The wrong two Beatles died.
The radar indicates a line of thunderstorms along the East Coast, but it also indicates a bunch of nuclear missiles coming at us, so I wouldn’t sweat the thunderstorms.
Nobody wants to save the world; they just want to save their little piece of it. Suppose the only reason the planet wanted us here in the first place was to provide Styrofoam and plastic bags? Some day the earth will shake us off like a bad case of the fleas.
Why does everyone carry around their own personal bottle of water now? When did everyone get so thirsty?
Maybe our loved ones aren’t all going to heaven. Maybe Grandma will end up baking pies in hell, with no oven.
If you’re not black, please turn your ball cap around.
When you get old, you can leave a place whenever you want. All you have to do is say, “I’m tired.” It’s great.
Hey, we’re bombing more brown people. Tell me when we were bombing some country that wasn’t brown? Yeah, there were the Nazis, but they were bombing brown people, and that’s our job.
Gone but not forgotten. RIP, George.
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About Me
- Bob Cordell
- El Paso, Texas, United States
- I live in El Paso, Tx and have for most of my life. My wife and I will celebrate our 20th Anniversary this year. We have two kids, a son who lives outside Dallas with his wife, and a daughter who just finished her Freshman year of college. My occupation for the past 28 years has been video production, mainly sports. I find growing older an interesting ride and want to share my experiences with others. Am I any wiser? That's up to you.
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2 comments:
Did you watch the first episode of Saturday Night Live last week? It's hard to put into words the feelings that evoked; seeing how much the players have aged, how many have died. And remembering the group of friends that used to get together and watch SNL - it was the basis of our Saturday night parties! And so many of them are gone. Realizing how much the world and life has changed; how did this happen? What is this strange parallel universe I have entered into, and how did I get here? Yes, it is very sad to loose the touchstones of your life. I'm glad that before he dies, George Carlin knew that he won the Mark Twain Award. I'll be watching that one on PBS!
Did you watch the first episode of Saturday Night Live last week? It's hard to put into words the feelings that evoked; seeing how much the players have aged, how many have died. And remembering the group of friends that used to get together and watch SNL - it was the basis of our Saturday night parties! And so many of them are gone. Realizing how much the world and life has changed; how did this happen? What is this strange parallel universe I have entered into, and how did I get here? Yes, it is very sad to loose the touchstones of your life. I'm glad that before he dies, George Carlin knew that he won the Mark Twain Award. I'll be watching that one on PBS!
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