The New Apple iPhone 3G’s are Hear

Wow, the new Apple iPhone is here. Are you as excited as I am? You can now own a cell phone for about two hundred dollars that you can then pay another ninety dollars a month for internet connection and whatever else the thing does. Just what I want folks on the freeway doing, texting their friends and checking on the latest baseball scores. It’s bad enough that some yo-yo in a Buick is screaming at his ex-wife as he goes between twelve and ninety miles an hour depending on the answers he’s getting from that good-for-nothing battleaxe. If he’d at least use his turn signal it wouldn’t be quite that bad.

Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not against progress. I have a computer and internet and I really find them useful – at home. Perhaps if I had twenty-five year old eyes I could stand looking at screen the size of a baby’s forehead. I also have a cell phone that was given to me at work. I turn it off when I get in the car. There is nothing that important that I need to screw up my driving to hear. You don’t want me talking on the phone when I’m driving, and I’d appreciate it if you’d return the favor. Oh, and all you people at the grocery store, the park and at public events, please be quiet. Figure out if you’re out of Vanilla Wafers before you go to the store.

I was at the movies a few months ago and a woman answered her ringing cell phone a couple of times and everyone wanted to stone her. It is the ultimate in selfishness to bring your world into the lives of people who not only do not care but are actively seeking to stay out of it by paying money to go into a darkened theater and escape reality for a couple of hours. After the movie, a teenager chastised her. I was stunned. I was in a doctor’s waiting room the other day and of the four of us there I was the only one who didn’t make a cell phone call in the fifteen minutes I sat there.

Cell phones are great for keeping track of your children and I highly recommend them for that purpose. They are also quite a help if you find your car dying and you’re stranded on the highway or there is some other true emergency. What I do not understand is someone who waits until they are in their car to call a friend to tell them they are going to be late. Why not call them before you get into your car?

If someone wants an entire communications system, internet and TV in the palm of their hands at all times, that’s fine with me. Just, please, use headphones, keep it down and if you crash into me while using your device in the car I’ll break it.

Peace, and quiet.